


traded my heart for the heroin

by malumqt (snowboy)



Category: 5 Seconds of Summer (Band)
Genre: Angst, Drabble, Drugs, M/M, What Have I Done, idk but have fun, oh man pals you're in for a wild ride
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-02-14
Updated: 2017-02-14
Packaged: 2018-09-24 06:05:21
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 577
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9706364
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/snowboy/pseuds/malumqt
Summary: Calum knew Michael needed help from the beginning. Parties involving drugs happened a bit too much. But he told himself it was small drugs, nothing bad, nothing that would get worse. He never took anything, making sure he could keep an eye on Michael as he took them all.





	

**Author's Note:**

> i wrote this in half an hour cause kohta blocked me, so blame kohta

Calum knew Michael needed help from the beginning. Parties involving drugs happened a bit too much. But he told himself it was small drugs, nothing bad, nothing that would get worse. He never took anything, making sure he could keep an eye on Michael as he took them all. 

Michael had specific reactions to each drug. Some made him cuddly as hell, others he wanted to blow Calum 24/7. But they were still supposed to be harmless drugs. It wasn't cocaine. Michael promised to never take cocaine. 

That wasn't enough though, Calum should've seen and made him promise to swear off so many more drugs. Opium, LSD, Heroin, but he didn't and he wasn't there.

Maybe if he was there everything would be different or they would both be dead because in the end, the drug didn't kill him. It was Michael's own addiction and dealings in shady areas of the city. 

He'd went missing for a couple days, which wasn't new, Calum would hope Michael would come back safely and right as he was about to go looking, Michael would appear, a blissed out smile on his sunken face.

There was a time where Michael swore it off. It lasted two weeks until the withdraw got to him. He was clawing at his skin, not sleeping, throwing up at least once a day. Calum wanted to take him to a doctor, to rehab, to something. But Michael left as soon as Calum made the suggestion.

Michael was always too stubborn for his own good and that also got him killed. Calum knew who was Michael's drug dealer, except at 2am Luke was sleeping soundly in his apartment. 

With desperate times, called for desperate measures. Michael had gone to a different guy in a different shady part of the city. If Calum had only been half an hour sooner finding him, maybe he wouldn't have got caught in a shoot out and wouldn't have bled to death in Calum's arms. 

But what's done is done. Calum had straightened the black suit. Looking in the mirror, he took in his disheveled appearance. The dark circles under his eyes, unkept curls that had finally been washed after a week, the slump in his shoulders. 

When everything started no one expected to be attending a funeral. No one thought it would be Michael. Both their parents were there, even Luke and Ashton. They'd barley known Michael, but they were still there offering support to Calum. Luke promising that he would never deal drugs again. 

Maybe that was the best and worst thing that came out of it. There were less drugs on the streets due to Luke, but at what cost? The cost of his fiance's life? The cost of both their lives? 

Calum may still be alive, but Michael was it for him. He knew Michael was it. No one would compare to Michael. Even in his drugs induced state Michael was there for him. 

And now he wasn't. He wasn't there anymore and Calum couldn't handle it. He threw his head back, swallowing the supply of drugs he had hidden from Michael. Calum would try to go through life, but if he took a couple pills here and there, just to feel closer to Michael, no one had to know.

The only had to know when he died 1 year and 2 months later of an overdose, the day he and Michael were supposed to be married.

**Author's Note:**

> if you wanna hmu or see if kohta blocked me over this fic @squirtledan on twitter


End file.
